Empathy Training: Why We Need to Teach It (and Live It)

When Hate Makes the Headlines

Over the weekend, a mass shooting took place at what was meant to be a family day for a Jewish festival. The attack was reportedly carried out by a father-and-son team. Early reporting suggested race and/or religion may have been a motivating factor.

Almost immediately, assumptions started flying.

Because the two men appeared to be Muslim, some people jumped straight to the familiar, lazy conclusion: that two individuals somehow represent an entire faith or community.

This is where empathy, or the lack of it, becomes visible.

The Part of the Story That Actually Matters

In an extraordinary and deeply human moment, a (Possibily) Muslim man risked his own life to tackle the gunman and stop the attack.

Let that land for a moment.

A local shop owner. Two young daughters. A man who didn’t hesitate.

Ahmed al Ahmed.

He acted like a true Aussie hero.

The footage shows the shooter clearly confused and shocked, it’s obvious he never planned for a shop owner to step in and dismantle his plan. Without that intervention, the death toll, last reported at 12, could have been far higher.

Ahmed put his life on the line for strangers. THANK YOU.

Social Media Did Something Right

In an unusual, and honestly wonderful, turn of events, social media didn’t just fill with hate.

Yes, there were still people trying to use the tragedy to push racism, immigration fear, and anti-Muslim rhetoric.

But something else happened too.

People who lead with empathy spoke up.

Again and again, hateful comments were met with one simple truth:

That sentence shut down a lot of nonsense.

Because empathy doesn’t argue ideology, it points to reality.

Love Responds Faster Than Hate

This was a horrific event. Nothing about it is okay.

But what I can already see happening is this:

Those who function from love, not hate, are lifting this man up. They don’t care what his religion is. They don’t care what his name sounds like. They don’t care what box he fits into.

They care that he saved lives.

Just like others who shielded their loved ones, or helped strangers escape, or ran toward danger instead of away from it.

That’s empathy in action.

This Is What Australia Actually Looks Like

Moments like this don’t divide us, they reveal us.

They show who moves through the world looking for reasons to hate…

And who moves through it looking for ways to protect, help, and stand up for others.

Australia will unite around this.

Empathy vs Narrative

I think this applies far beyond this one event.

In conspiracy spaces, alternative belief systems, politics, religion, everywhere, there are two camps:

• Those who lead with love, curiosity, and care

• And those looking for any excuse to spread hate, lies, or fear to suit their own narrative

Empathy is what separates them.

A Note on Social Media, Kids & the Bandaid Problem

Recently in Australia, the age of access to social media has been raised, largely because of growing concern about how cruel teens can be to one another when they’re hidden behind a screen.

And yes, something needed to change.

But to me, that solution feels a bit like the outdated advice many of us heard growing up:

That logic doesn’t address the real issue. It simply shifts responsibility onto the potential victim instead of dealing with the behaviour itself.

Raising the age limit is a bandaid. It limits access, but it doesn’t teach empathy, accountability, or emotional literacy, especially for repeat offenders.

Now imagine a different approach.

Imagine if all kids, and yes, even some of the parents of kids who repeatedly harm others, went through structured empathy training.

Or were exposed to something like the famous “Blue Eyes / Brown Eyes” experiment by Jane Elliott, WATCH https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f2z-ahJ4uws which powerfully demonstrated how quickly people internalise prejudice, power, and exclusion, and how deeply it affects behaviour.

That experiment wasn’t about shame. It was about felt experience.

Empathy isn’t learned by rules alone. It’s learned when people can truly feel the impact of their actions.

Until we teach that, properly we’ll keep patching systems instead of changing them.

What can we do?

Since 1993, Danish schools have included structured weekly time for students (about age 6–16) to talk through issues, listen to one another, and practise helping classmates solve problems, meaning they build emotional awareness and compassion alongside academic subjects. This “Klassens tid” isn’t fluff; it reduces bullying and creates stronger social skills. WATCH(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTqyBlWHi84)

Because empathy isn’t weakness.

It’s a skill.

And like any skill, it can be taught, practised, and strengthened.

Below is a snapshot of homicide related fatalities, using the best available national data.

Violence & Harm: Australia vs Denmark

Homicide Rate (Intentional killings per 100,000 population)

These figures show Denmark’s homicide rate is lower than Australia’s based on recent comparative crime data.

The Only Identity That Matters

At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter what colour your skin is, what religion you follow, what your name is, or what footy team you barrack for (The last one an Aussie essential!). Progress happens when love is present; and harm is not tolerated.

Empathy doesn’t cancel strength, and strength doesn’t cancel compassion, the two work best together.

A true Aussie celebrates a true hero, regardless of labels or beliefs. Empathy isn’t about belief systems at all; it’s about being a good human. And yes, some religions can behave like cults, but so can political movements and online groups. What matters isn’t the structure people belong to, but the values they live by.

People raised with kindness, solid morals, strong ethics, and genuine care for others are the people I want to stand next to. Maybe it’s time we stop assuming empathy is automatic, and start teaching it. -Ang